Don't mention the war!

Shoppers in Germany might feel a little embarrassed about asking for "Ficken" schnapps by name – after all, the drink is named after the German word for "fuck".

But last week, Germany’s Federal Patent Court ruled that the word 'ficken' can be registered as a trademark,” Der Spiegel reports. The case was taken to the country’s highest patent court after attempts to get the name registered with the German Patent and Trademark Office failed. As a result, the company now owns the 'Ficken' trademark for clothing, mineral water and fruit drinks, in addition to alcoholic beverages. The Federal Patent Court explained that the name is not "sexually discriminatory" and "does not violate public morals", although it is unquestionably in poor taste.

The word "ficken" is quite possibly the source of the English "fuck", as demonstrated by Monty Python's Uses Of The Word Fuck sketch.

Found in The Globe and Mail on Sep. 20, 2011.

Gilpin Family Whisky

In Australia, "piss" can be used as slang for alcohol. James Gilpin, a researcher who has diabetes, takes this to a whole new level with his Gilpin Family Whisky:

Sugar heavy urine excreted by diabetic patients is now being utilized for the fermentation of high-end single malt whisky for export.

The source material is acquired from elderly volunteers, including Gilpin's own grandmother. The urine is purified and the sugars are added to the mash stock to accelerate the whisky's fermentation process. According to this article:

The original idea came from an (unverified) story he heard about a pharmaceutical company that supposedly set up a factory next to an old people's home and would swap cushions and soft toys for the residents' urine. They'd then process the urine to remove the chemicals that had passed straight through the dilapidated endochrine systems of the patients, which could then be put straight back into new medicine.

Given that astronauts drink recycled urine, who can complain?

Crystal Head Vodka

In a momentary departure from home-made alcohol, let me introduce Dan Aykroyd's Crystal Head Vodka. Yes, Dan Aykroyd.

Designed by an American landscape artist (John Alexander), the container was inspired by a fascination with Day of the Dead ceremonies and Aykroyd’s long-time interest in the occult. It was originally something of a lark, but with retail sales of over $40 million people now line up at stores wherever Dan Aykroyd shows for bottle signings. The one place they won't line up is in Ontario, the only state or province in North America to ban the bottle from store shelves.

Further details can be found in this article.

First "bourbon" recipe

Mash

• 3kg frozen corn kernels;
• 1kg dark malt extract;
• 1kg(?) brewing sugar;
• 1pkt "classic" spirits yeast; and
• 1pkt yeast nutrients.

1. Chop corn kernels (eg, in a blender).
2. Gently simmer in water for 45 minutes.
3. Add malt to the pot and simmer for 30 minutes.
4. Dissolve brewing sugar in the pot.
5. Pour pot contents into 23L carboy and fill with cold water.
6. Add yeast and yeast nutrient.

Wood chips

• 16mm x 1.2m Tasmanian oak dowel
• 500g Coles organic raw sugar

1. Caramelise sugar in a saucepan.
2. Slice dowel into short segments and place in boiling water for 5 minutes.
3. Dilute the caramelised sugar (approx 2 parts caramel to 1 part water).
4. Simmer the dowel segments in the caramel in a covered pot for at 1–3hrs.
5. Divide the dowel into two piles, wrap each in aluminium foil.
6. Bake the first lot of dowel at 140C for around 6hrs.
7. Bake the second lot of dowel at 210C for around 8hrs.

Fusel alcohol

Fusel alcohols, also known as fusel oils, are higher-order alcohols (ie, alcohols with more than two carbon atoms) formed by fermentation and present in cider, mead, beer, wine, and spirits to varying degrees.

Excessive concentrations of these fractions may cause off flavours. Some beverages, such as whisky, traditional ales and ciders, are expected to have relatively high concentrations of fusel alcohols as part of the flavour profile. In other beverages, such as vodka and lagers, the presence of fusel alcohols is considered a fault. Very high concentrations—usually caused by incompetent distillation—can cause acute illness, including headaches, nausea, vomiting, clinical depression, or coma.

Fusel alcohols are formed when fermentation occurs:

• At higher temperatures;
• At lower pH; and
• When yeast activity is limited by low nitrogen content.

During distillation, fusel alcohols are concentrated in the "tails" at the end of the distillation run. They have an oily consistency, which is noticeable to the distiller, hence the other name "fusel oil". If desired, these heavier alcohols can be almost completely separated in a reflux still. Freeze distillation, on the other hand, does not remove fusel alcohols.

Starting a home-made bourbon

The mash is fermenting and some Tasmanian oak has been charred. More details and further progress to follow soon...